Monday Morning Thoughts

This weekend I was once again targeted by someone needing to remind me that J & P have adopted twin boys. There was an email sent out by C inviting people to a “Finalization” party this past Thurs. Someone decided to place a copy of this email in my mailbox and highlight a few sentences. Those highlighted were meant to hurt me….I guess!

- It is to celebrate the finalization of the adoption of the most beautiful boys…

-Its been a long hard journey…

MOVE ON PEOPLE!!!!

If I were given the chance to reply to this particular person I would probable inform them that I already knew about this party. I may live in a city with about 40,000 people, but it’s still a small world. J & P and I know many of the same people. I could get sarcastic and tell them some of the things I have heard about this party.

1- “We are so sick of hearing about the adoption. It’s crazy! First there was a Welcome Home Party then there was the Adoption Party then the boys turned 2 years old and now a FINALIZATION party.”

2-”I’m not going….I bought them enough stuff.”

I believe C is organizing all these things. People are starting to feel that she is going overboard. Knowing J, my gut reaction would be that J would feel the same. She often talked to me about C making issues much bigger than they are. I’m sure C is just so happy and excited for J & P, but it’s starting to get a negative response from others.

I didn’t have any emotional issues this time. I simple took the email and made a copy, put a sticky note on it that said, “FYI Found in my mailbox this weekend.” and put the copy in my director’s mailbox. Haven’t heard from my director yet.

The person who put this in my mailbox could be anyone. I guess C had copies all over the unit this past Mon. Our shift leader took them all down saying they will only bring trouble. Well, I guess she was right. Someone took it upon themselves to share with me.

What I don’t understand is why this person feels I need to know this stuff. Does she/he think it will tear me apart? Do they just like shoving the adoption in my face? Are they doing it to make me react? Why would they do this? I really don’t understand. J & P have obviously gone on with their lives, why can’t this person. J & P are happy, I am happy, why isn’t this person happy unless they involve me in things I don’t need to be involved in?

Moving on…..

Karen (VI teacher) emailed me Fri. Got more to add to that WONDERFUL IEP! Here. Eli will be transported to and from school. The bus will pick him up right at our front door. Yes-you heard me I don’t have to take him or pick him up from school anymore. This means, I don’t have to wake PooWee up, I don’t have to get dress, and best of all, I don’t have to go out in below zero weather! I’m feeling guilty, I am fully capable of transporting him. But, K told me to think of it as a form of independence for Eli.

PooWee has an ear appt today. It’s his check up from the tube placement. Since the tubes he has had an ear infection. Actually ended us up in the Emergency room one late Friday night with a 14.7 fever that wasn’t going down. So, I still worry about more ear infections.

Andrew’s Lacrosse team has their last game in the semifinals tonight. If they win they will be off to state. It looks like rain out there, I hope it doesn’t. This will be the last game I will be able to make. The state championships are on the weekend. His team is currently rated 3rd in the state. They team has actually only been around for four years too. They have come along way.

Chad has given one of his jobs his two week notice. He’s going to take a short break from working so much, but will be trying to find another one. He really couldn’t stand the job he quite, so he’shappy to be leaving. He’s still goneall the time. Either working, school or by Ella. Truthfully, I kinda miss him. I usually know he was home to shower because of his clothes on the bathroom floor.

He called one night to see if I had any formula they could use for Ella. Here they ran out, it was late and no one really felt like running all the way to the store. I unfortunately did not, but I did offer some frozen breastmilk. He declined and ran off to the store.

I finally got a new camera! LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!!! Got a 12X zoom, and sound on the video! (My last camera didn’t have sound and that bummed me out.) I’ve been taking pictures like crazy. Guess maybe I’m making up for the four months that I was camera-less.

I’ve got a 10 minute video of PooWee playing in his sandbox. He loves watching it. He eventually wonders out of the sandbox and attempts to walk towards the road. I even got him throwing his fit, because I won’t allow him to go. He gets a real confusing look on his face when he watches himself cry and throw himself to the ground.

I wish I could share some of my pictures with you, however…my computer is still not fixed. We are using Andrew’s and he’s pretty stubborn when it comes to downloading onto his computer. I’m begging him everyday though. PPPLLLLEEEEEAAAAASSSSSEEEEE Andrew!

 

 

Ella

I GOT TO SEE ELLA TODAY!! She is beautiful!

On my way I stopped and got April a gift certificate for a nursing bra. I got Chad a “Daddy’s Girl” picture frame. And then they both got a magnetic frame for their lockers at school. Chad was excited because it was the first gift he got.

Mom is doing very well. She’s nusing and things are goig pretty good so far. She’ll be going home today. For the remainder of this school year she will be on home based through her high school. Her dad is off of work to help her.

Dad is just shining. I can’t believe how “gitty” and happy he is. He has stayed at the hospital with April every night. He’ll come home for a short time and show off the new pictures he took, tell me what all has happened and then rush off. He’ll say, “I better get back by April, I don’t wnt her to be alone.” Yet, I think he doesn’t want to be away from his daughter for too long.

April and Chad are not “together” anymore. Actually, Chad has a girlfriend, but I wooooonnderrrrr. You can almost see some “new” feelings going on between the two. If anything I think they will be working hard to maintain a close friendship. They definately are showing the love to their daughter.

Grandpa (April’s dad) can’t get the smile off his face. This lil girl will have him wrapped around her lil fingers in no time.

I actually didn’t intend on going to the hospital because of PooWee being so sick. (Which he ended up sick again on Sat. night and Sun. morning. I took him in to the walk in on Sun as soon as they opened. They are running some poo-poo test. So far so good, some take about a week though. Then I had to pick up some new meds.) Anyways…Chad kept “hinting” that he wanted me to come up. I think he just wanted some of his “family” to share his joy. And well, he has no family here except his brother and his brother wouldn’t come. So, I found a sitter (G-ma’s throwing up now too. :(   ) and headed up there this morning to support him. It looks like we are really the only “family” he has right now. POOR GUY!

Alright enough babble…here’s a link to check out their beautiful daughter. (Obviously you’; see there real names Allison and Jordan, but I’ll continue to call them April and Chad on here.)

Ella Marie

SHE’S HERE!!!

Ella was born at 3:41pm today. Weighing 8lb 10oz. 21 inches long. She’s got dark hair and the famous blue eyes. 10 fingers and 10 toes.

Chad DID stay for delivery. Last he mentioned, he didn’t plan on staying in the room. When he was explaining it he couldn’t find the words. I said, “Was it the most amazing thing you’ve ever experienced?” “YEAH!” he replied. “Is she the most beautiful lil thing you’ve ever seen?” “OOOHH YEAH!” I think Chad know knows what love really is.

He got to cut the cord. As he did the doctor pretended Chad cut his finger. I guess it was quite funny.

Chad passed on the first diaper change. He’s regretting that now, as he learnt about the “tar-poop”.  He’s got the next diaper. We know what he’s praying for!

April managed to do natural childbirth. I don’t have the details on when she went in, but I know it was last night some time. I can’t believe she had an 8lb 10 oz lil girl!! She just a tall skinny lil thing. (But, then again ya never would have guessed I had an 8lber either.)

Well, I must get my buttocks off to bed!

OH-POOWEE HAS DONE A 180!!! He was awesome today. Last night Dr.R had me FORCE feed him every 5 min. some Pedialyte for an hour. I used a medicine syringe. I felt so STUPID-why didn’t I think of that! But, the nurse and Dr. J never thought of it either, so maybe I’m not THAT dumb! G-ma had him for the full 12hrs today. I think the two of them had a BLAST. Uncle Larry stopped over and they played and played. It was a beautiful day here, so PooWee even went outside with him for a bit. HE LOVED IT.

I gave PooWee a little lecture last night! I warned him, if he didn’t get better he was going to the hospital. I guess he listened!

Is Spring Break Over YET!!!!!

What a week! The boys had spring break this week, which means I had a house full of boys. BOYS BOYS BOYS BOYS BOYS!!!!!!!!! Video games, soda, pizzas, chips, and BOYS! Where oh where are the pretty lil girls?

What is it with boys that they have to be so loud when the play the video games. Why do they hoot and howler at the TV? They consume the entire living room with TVs and XBoxes. PooWee would make a mad run for any controller left unattended. He thought he was way cool hanging with the big guys.

I managed to squeeze my way into the couch to fold laundry yesterday. I step out for two minutes and return to find my underwear getting thrown back and forth! My bra (Oh the beautiful nursing bra that it is) is being worn by friend # 13, carefully stuffed with some socks.

I must say it was rather nice when they all decided to go see a movie at 9:30 last night!

However, when I woke up this morning and Andrew was not home with my car I began to freak! He did text me saying he was with B. The text lacked details though. Like, “I’m going to spend the night!” Wise child that he is, left his cell phone at home and I did not have B’s number. Chad had left the house right before I got out of bed, so I gave him a jingle. He was off to his girlfriend’s house, but gave B a call to have Andrew come home. BIG OOPS on Andrew’s part, now he’s stuck going to the grocery store with me! WaaHaaaHaaa- he hates going to the grocery.

Chad’s mother and I had a good conversation. We both would like to see Chad quit a job. Chad is wearing himself out fast. We want him to go out for lacrosse, I will be emailing the coach to see if he can still get in. (Lacrosse started 2 weeks ago.) She wants Chad to communicate more with her on the baby’s needs. He just always tells her he has it under-control. She is looking at moving back to Wisconsin, but not here. Which is why she is in Wisconsin then back in North Carolina then back here. Chad will be going to visit her this weekend. It appears that Chad is treating us as two divorced parents. Getting money from her and me! (LITTLE SHIT!) I can’t be too upset, as it doesn’t surprise me. Kids will be kids. Andrew likes to tell his dad stuff and then me. Andrew found out quickly that his father and I are good communicators and I think Chad is finding that out too!

Well, I guess “my time” on the computer is up! You would think the kids paid the bills!

Hopefully, next week I’ll actually get an INTERESTING post out there!

My Thoughts Go Out to Chad

My heart goes out to Chad so much lately. I feel he is working too much. He actually works two jobs and goes to school. One paycheck goes towards his soon to be daughter and the other needs to pay his car insurance, cell phone, gas, and anything else he may require. It’s too much…to much for him to handle. He hasn’t had a day off for about two weeks.

I’m frustrated. Frustrated with his mother. Why CAN’T she help him out more. He’d be costing her alot more than the $200 she sends me a month if he were living with her. She has been traveling back and forth from Wisconsin to North Carolina a couple of times now. She stays with her sister in southern Wisconsin, so Chad doesn’t even get to see her. What I don’t understand is how she can afford all this traveling, but can’t put lunch money into Chad’s account. I don’t say anything in fear that she won’t allow Chad to live with s anymore. He’s a pleasure to have here and I wouldn’t want to see him leave.

I’ve been giving Andrew extra money and he’s been buying Chad lunch because Chad wouldn’t except any money from me for lunch. Andrew figured out that the school charges more for the second meal though. So, Chad finally agreed to except a check from me and put it into his account. Can I afford it, NO, but sometimes we act from the heart instead of the size of our bank accounts.

Chad is getting run down. He’s been sick since he moved in. He’s tired, he’s stressed, he just straight out WORN OUT!

I know that he would love to be in lacrosse with Andrew. But, instead he heads off to work. Becoming a father has already affected his life and he’s taking it on full blast. However, I feel his school work is affected by him working so much and this it not good.

I so strongly feel he shouldn’t be working two jobs. I think it’s TOO much. Legally he’s working too many hours according to our state laws for school age kids. But, do I say something to the school? How? Would I be risking his mom taking him back to North Carolina? I’m not sure it’s my place to say or do anything!

I’m half tempted to tell him to quit one and we will manage. I’ll just take him on as my own. I’d have to help him with insurance, gas and his cell though and I can’t do all that. If I could put him on my insurance and my cell plan that would be do able…MAYBE. However, he’s stuck in a contract with his cell.

Plus, his car…well, technically his mom left him her 2003 Saab, YES a WAY BETTER car than I have and I can’t afford insurance on that baby. I’m not even sure what he pays a month on it, but I’m sure it’s plenty. Here we have a teenager who has had his license less than a year, as primary driver…he’s paying ALOT.

Yes, Chad is going to be a father soon. Yes, he will be facing many issues, normal 16 year old don’t, but he still needs some time to be a kid. My hope is once his daughter is born, things will calm down for him. That he will have time to be with his daughter and time to hang with his friends. With him working these two jobs and going to school, he doesn’t even have time for himself.

Is it best that he be here in Wisconsin? Or should he be in North Carolina, which he didn’t like and away from his daughter and friends. He wants to be here.

He plans on joining the military after high school. He has goals. I want to see him succeed. He will, if he is given the chance. I fear he may rebel if his stress load doesn’t get lighter. UGH! What can I do to help him more? How can I be there for him? I hope he feels he can come to me if he needs anything.

I’ve thought about getting a second part time job myself. I figure maybe he could watch the PooWee babes and I could work a few hours a week. I would make more than he would working. This could help us out and then maybe he could quit a job. But, I fight this thought because of the time it would take me away from PooWee, Elijah, and Andrew. Yet, evenjust 10-15 hrs a week. Maybe I could even get a job at night when they are sleeping!

AARRRRR - I just don’t know. I don’t think he’s going to make it too much longer at the rate he’s going.

What we’ve been up to

WOW, things have just been crazy around here. Which is why I haven’t posted for a days.

Andrew had a good time in Spain, though he complained about how expensive everything was. I guess a soda was $3 and about half the size of our soda cans.

He braved all and went into the ocean. Though his father argued that he wasn’t sure Andrew actually went IN because he was OUT quite fast. Andrew argued that he did it twice and stated it was FREEZING.

While shopping the other day I got to learn ALL about alligators. Andrew was going on and on about them. Here one night at the hotel, the only program he could find that was in English was a National Geographic program about….yep alligators!

His father and now step-mom got married on a boat.  Andrew’s grandpa videotaped the wedding, I can’t wait to see it and all the pictures.

Elijah got his long white cane and…lost it! He received it on Wed and it was lost by Sun. We THINK he set it on the car seat and then it slipped into the garbage we keep in the car. I emptied that garbage on pickup day. We were both freaking…what was school going to say? I figured I would just replace it.

He was very upset because he promised his mobility specialist he wouldn’t lose it. He was even sleep walking and mumbling about not knowing where it was. Two nights he was walking around saying, “I can’t find my cane! Where’s my cane!” SLEEPING, it was hard to wake him up and get him back to bed. I barely slept worrying about him walking around. And PooWee still gets up for his “snacks” at night, so I have been very sleep deprived. His mobility specialist told us, “Canes get broken, canes get lost, canes can be replaced…and so it will be!” She told me not to worry about replacing it and she will take care of it. Yet, even last night Eli was dreaming about it. Guess he’s just really wondering what happened to it. I really am too, he was VERY cautious of where he put it.

PooWee has discovered what a step stool is for. He is pushing it all over the place and getting into even more stuff. He climbs on it and then whines for help to get down. I have to go hold his hand, then he jumps down.

He was kinda cranky the other day and just would not let me do anything. I REALLY needed to get the dishes done, so I pulled his stool over to the sink, stood him up on it and turned the water on slowly. He helped me with dishes. HE HAD A BLAST! Filling a cup up and then dumping it over and over. Of course he was soaked, the floor was wet and even I got quite wet, BUT…I got my dishes DONE!

I BOUGHT A SNOWBLOWER!  I BOUGHT A SNOWBLOWER!!!   YAY!!!!!

I even used it, and it was kinda fun! It’s not a very big one, but it blows the snow right up that darn hill on the side. I was blowing snow way into the middle of the back yard. I was loving it! Now I’m living the “high life!”

When I went to look most stores were completely out. Lawnmowers were out already. I found two stores with just a few on hand yet. I had my choice of the one I got or a really big one. I think I may have fantasized about the bigger ones. I would be the coolest chic on the block with one of them, but seeing they were $1000.00 - I choose the $250.00 one instead. Andrew tried talking me out of it, saying “We don’t need one anymore, winter is almost over!” OH NO, I WASN’T GOING TO HEAR THAT AGAIN! We say that every year when I get my taxes back and then when the following winter comes, we’re whining we don’t have one.  

Today we got 8-12 inches of snow. Andrew went out and blew. I think he’s happy I got it too. Eli really wants to check it out, so tomorrow I may go out and blow some more with him. The plow has yet to go down our road, so I’m sure there will be a nice pile at the end of the driveway. We’ll see how much power this baby really has! Just need to think of  name for her yet.

My birthday was the 13th. 34 years old! The boys and I went out for supper. It was nice. I got a  gift certificate for Starbucks from my sister Gayle!!!! (THANKS SO MUCH GAYLE!! LOVE YOU ALL!!) SO EXCITED ’bout that, ‘cus I am addicted to Starbucks, but HATE spending so much for coffee. When Starbucks first came to town I swore I wasn’t even going to enter the place. I did good until they put a little kiosk in the hospital lobby! How convenient, just a short walk from where I work. Yeah, they sucked me right in!

I got the boys, Andrew and Chad a bunk bed. Twin on top and futon on the bottom. They’re getting the room straighten out slowly, but it’s coming along. Elijah and I went through his two dressers and gave them to Andrew and Chad. Elijah’s clothes are now in a storage unit I bought. I think it’ll be easier for him to see and keep his clothes neatly put away. We cleaned out Andrew’s closet, which was basically a storage closet for odds and ends.

This past week has basically been cleaning, yet my place is a disaster! There are boxes here and there. Stuff for Good Will and stuff to get down to the basement. Next we have to get to the basement and make room for all this STUFF.

Chad went to his first doctors appointment with April this past week. He planned on just sitting in the waiting room. I told him he HAD to go in and hear the heartbeat. He went in with her. I think he’ll be going to more with her too.

I attended her babyshower on Sat. I posted a super quick post about it on her blog. I have alot of things I want to do for her yet. UGGGGG where is the time going??!!!

I suppose I should catch some shut eye tonight. I actually have to go to a mandatory educational program tomorrow morning for work. I don’t want to! Yes I’m whining! I just put in 38hrs in the past three days. I don’t want to return to that place till next weekend! HEY! Maybe we’ll get more snow and the roads will be super bad and then I’ll have an excuse not to go! I guess winter is good for something….sometimes!

4 + 1 = 5

It’s official we are adding another member to our household! Yes, call me crazy, but I have to give it a try.

Chad will be moving in.

In the beginning of the school year Chad moved down to N. Carolina with his parents. He didn’t like it there and then there was the fact that April was pregnant. His parents agreed to let him come back up and live with his brother. Well, things aren’t all too great there, basically it’s the brothers girlfriend. Chad’s mother came back up to take him back down to N. Carolina. However, Chad’s counsellor did suggest he stay up here if he had a better place to stay. His reasons were legit for Chad’s mother. Chad’s school last semester got really screwed up with being up here, then moving south, then coming back. And then there is the fact that Chad’s daughter will be born in a few months.

His mother and I talked for quite awhile on Tuesday. Everything is worked out. Andrew is leaving for Spain tomorrow, so I guess Chad will be hanging out at another friends house until Andrew comes home. He’ll feel a bit ackward with Andrew not being here, right off the bat. Which is understandable. I sent Andrew to school today with a house key for Chad. I told him to tell him, he is more than welcome to come over during the time Andrew is gone. I reminded him that I will be gone to work from 6am to about 8pm over the weekend, so he might enjoy the house to himself.

Both Chad’s mother and I expressed to the boys how they will also need to separate from each other once in awhile. Oh, they will probably fight like brothers now and then. Eli said it’s gonna be like he has another brother. I reminded him TO BE NICE TO CHAD!!

I really want Chad to feel at home. One concern is he doesn’t have a bed. His mom is going to get him an air mattress for now. Andrew has been wanting a futon, so we are looking into them. My thought is IF we get the moola from the government, I’ll get a bunk bed with a futon on the bottom. Andrew said that would be cool.

Chad has to improve his grades by the next progress report (’bout mid March) or he’s going back down to N. Carolina. So, that’s my goal, remind him about his homework. I’m kinda excited, I do really like him.

It’s funny because a while ago I was talking to my mom. I started telling her how worried I was about him. I told her I knew what she was going to say to me, “Don’t you think you have enough to worry about than to worry about him too!” She chuckled, and you could tell she was worried about him too. She really likes him as well. He actually calls her Grandma too, actually all of Andrew’s friends do. And when I told her that he was moving in, she didn’t seem upset at me. I somewhat expected her to tell me it wasn’t a good idea. I guess she feels like I do, atleast I can try, if it doesn’t work out….I tried.

Andrew wrote up a list of rules for Chad. Some are quite funny. Keep in mind as you read, these are teenage boys!

1-NO keeping me up at night

2-No messing with my stuff

3-No leaving without telling me or Mom

4-Must listen to EVERYTHING Mom says -(I think Andrew needs to practice this one!)

5-No girlfriends over

6-Suicide is NOT an option (I don’t think living at my home will be THAT BAD!)

7-No pleasing yourself in the house. GO TO YOUR CAR!!

8-If previous rule is broken, computer security will be enabled

9-Respect my room, our closets are smaller than J***’s (Chad basically had a pantry for a room at his brothers.)

10-No phone sex too! No one wants to hear it!

11-Must have equal rights to video games, TV etc.

12-Must do homework, no tricks, we’ll be watching you!

13-No sneaking out! Privileges will be taken away, such as a bed and warm blankies.

14-No b*tching ALL DAY!

15-You shower first, must be done by 6:50.

16-Must give me rides to school.

17-April is my friend, treat her good! -Inspired by April

18-No skipping school or getting ticked off and leaving.

19-Breaking of rules will invoke consequences

20-More rules may be added when needed

We all had a pretty good laugh. Some are quite appropriate though, makes me wonder why Andrew doesn’t always follow them!

Well, I’m off to the grocery store! WOW TWO TEENAGERS TO FEED NOW! Wonder if I have enough cupboard space!