Just Drained

I have to find a new job! I just can’t take this anymore! But I can’t! I won’t make the money I make here. I like working 3 days having four off and I know what my schedule will be all the time.

I know it’s not all about the money. I know I shouldn’t stay because I make more here, but I need to provide for my boys.

Funny – just the other day Jenna wrote about revisiting places, I commented and she returned with how strong I was.  Well, I went back just now and re-commented-I’m not that strong anymore! I can’t do this anymore. I need out!

I wish I could work from home. I don’t care if I would have to stay up all night to do it either. I wouldn’t need the daycare assistance either then. Been thinking about Medical Transcriptionist. With the diploma I have, Health Unit Coordinator I believe there is only a few additional classes. However, it’s been 7 years since I was in school, so how much would I need to re-take. And I’m told you have to have a few years experience before you can even work from home. I don’t know what to do. I really just wanna be at home, I’d do anything!

I would also like to just pack up and move away. Not necessarily to run away from all this, but even just to start over someplace new. A WARM climate destination sounds AWESOME to me!!! As long as my mom would come with! I could never leave her. I can’t leave anyways! Andrew needs to finish school here with his friends. I know he wouldn’t want to move and I’m not gonna  move without him! But, dreaming of it sure feels nice!

So well, yeah- I left work early. Just had to get out of there. Got Elijah and PooWees and just hugged them both crazily. PooWee and I laid down when I got home and I just cried holding him. He’s so special. I didn’t wanna let go of him, but he got too interested in the kitties, so I had to let him venture off to play.

Why do I let these people get to me? Why can’t I stay strong?

3 Responses so far »

  1. 1

    BIGGEST sister said,

    I know where that warm climate is. I know where you would have more support than you could ever need. I know your Mom could come with & is so deeply wanted there too. I know there has to be a job/career as there are 5 hospitals. I know we are praying & waiting with open arms.

  2. 2

    does"oldest" sister sound better said,

    I’m being silly now, my attempt to stop the tears & heartache. Love to you all

  3. 3

    [...] Uncategorized I MUST show all of you, my new friends, what my sister Gayle commented under my Just Drained. I read it today around 4:30 when I took a break. I just started bawling. I’ve been crying [...]


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